Invert this!
Yeah I know, inversion isn't the cure all I had hoped it would be. I at least thought it would work.
I got this inversion table for christmas from my caring mother. She thought maybe it would end up helping me with my backpain and sciatic nerve issues. Well, I finally put it together today because of the previously posted back pains.
Well guess what, it all goes together really nicely. I am thinking this is gonna be great! The first lady is upstairs laying down (she has been put on 4 hrs bed rest due to high blood pressure and the possibility of toxemia) and I am watching the hockey game. So I figure it is a good time to get inverted. I go over and back, and am watching the game upside down. I am feeling the gentle pull of gravity working on my back, and am kind of enjoying the sensation of all the blood rushing to my head. I decided to get up now, as my feet are slipping out and I dont want to break my neck. So, I bend my knees a little, and move my arms to my waist...... nothing happens. I am still upside down. So I use all my strength and shimmy up the inversion table. STILL NO TILTING BACK TO NORMAL!!!! I struggle, I pull, I push, I squirm. NOTHING!!!! So now in my desperate state, I call for the first lady.....and I call again...and now I am yelling.....and no response.
So now I am stuck upside down on the verge of passing out, and I already have a slipped disk, so what does one do....I finally realize that I am going to have to slide out of this thing in some way or another, without crashing into the flat screen tv, the gas fireplace, or the large window that leads to a 9 foot fall to the backyard. It turns out, the best option was to roll towards the window, and with a slight twist, a half gainer, and a triple toe loop, I managed to slide down the inversion table, onto the floor, and avoid all the obstacles.
The inversion table is now in the garage, and will be going in the first garage sale, or dumpster. Whichever shows up first.
That was a great 15 minutes of my life.
I got this inversion table for christmas from my caring mother. She thought maybe it would end up helping me with my backpain and sciatic nerve issues. Well, I finally put it together today because of the previously posted back pains.
Well guess what, it all goes together really nicely. I am thinking this is gonna be great! The first lady is upstairs laying down (she has been put on 4 hrs bed rest due to high blood pressure and the possibility of toxemia) and I am watching the hockey game. So I figure it is a good time to get inverted. I go over and back, and am watching the game upside down. I am feeling the gentle pull of gravity working on my back, and am kind of enjoying the sensation of all the blood rushing to my head. I decided to get up now, as my feet are slipping out and I dont want to break my neck. So, I bend my knees a little, and move my arms to my waist...... nothing happens. I am still upside down. So I use all my strength and shimmy up the inversion table. STILL NO TILTING BACK TO NORMAL!!!! I struggle, I pull, I push, I squirm. NOTHING!!!! So now in my desperate state, I call for the first lady.....and I call again...and now I am yelling.....and no response.
So now I am stuck upside down on the verge of passing out, and I already have a slipped disk, so what does one do....I finally realize that I am going to have to slide out of this thing in some way or another, without crashing into the flat screen tv, the gas fireplace, or the large window that leads to a 9 foot fall to the backyard. It turns out, the best option was to roll towards the window, and with a slight twist, a half gainer, and a triple toe loop, I managed to slide down the inversion table, onto the floor, and avoid all the obstacles.
The inversion table is now in the garage, and will be going in the first garage sale, or dumpster. Whichever shows up first.
That was a great 15 minutes of my life.
posted by Rally at
8:30 PM
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