Perpetual Motion
My brain is spinning, almost out of control. I thought that after the wedding, everything would slow down, but it really seems to have simply sped up.
I have not been sleeping well, I have had some rather intense dreams about sex, and pinning you up against the wall, and taking you hard and fast, not rough, but passionately. Yet that never seems to come about. Probably a direct result of my inaction, but I don't think you are really interested anyhow. I have started to bust my ass at work again. I will do this for awhile, until it dawns on me that all the hard work is for nothing, and that nobody is going to notice if I actually do achieve the goals I have set. The joys of working in a union shop I guess. There is still so much to do. So much that never seems to get done. I don't know if it is a classic manifestation of my perpetual lack of motivation, or if I simply have too much on my proverbial plate. I could make a list. I wouldn't tackle it though. Really no point.
So, I have been trying to find a way to hit the homerun. The fast and easy way to financial freedom, it seems that while there is some remote possibilty that it could occur, the risk far outweighs the reward. Perhaps hardwork is the only way to go.
It would be great to harness the power of this perpetual motion machine inside my head. I haven't really been able to wrap my hands around everything, and put it down in the blog. There is so much in there. There is my shit, political shit, global shit....that's a lot of shit! I have also started worrying too much about other people. I can feel myself getting pulled in to peoples problems again, and wanting to fix them. While I CRAVE baggage, I need to stop taking it on. It is not my burden to carry....I am also noticing that I just can't seem to watch shows or commercials or anything with small children in it. I am not even a Dad yet, and I am getting emotional over this stuff. This is very far from my character. It is almost as though I am becoming a woman.
Did I mention that I am getting fat....no seriously...tipped the scales at 222.5 yesterday. Fuck I need to get through the holidays below 230 and get my ass in gear. Thank god I will be getting some help with that from Santa.
I am gonna go now. Clearly this is not entertaining. I apologize. In the future I will try to be more entertaining. I may even become more entertaining tonight. Who knows.....
I have not been sleeping well, I have had some rather intense dreams about sex, and pinning you up against the wall, and taking you hard and fast, not rough, but passionately. Yet that never seems to come about. Probably a direct result of my inaction, but I don't think you are really interested anyhow. I have started to bust my ass at work again. I will do this for awhile, until it dawns on me that all the hard work is for nothing, and that nobody is going to notice if I actually do achieve the goals I have set. The joys of working in a union shop I guess. There is still so much to do. So much that never seems to get done. I don't know if it is a classic manifestation of my perpetual lack of motivation, or if I simply have too much on my proverbial plate. I could make a list. I wouldn't tackle it though. Really no point.
So, I have been trying to find a way to hit the homerun. The fast and easy way to financial freedom, it seems that while there is some remote possibilty that it could occur, the risk far outweighs the reward. Perhaps hardwork is the only way to go.
It would be great to harness the power of this perpetual motion machine inside my head. I haven't really been able to wrap my hands around everything, and put it down in the blog. There is so much in there. There is my shit, political shit, global shit....that's a lot of shit! I have also started worrying too much about other people. I can feel myself getting pulled in to peoples problems again, and wanting to fix them. While I CRAVE baggage, I need to stop taking it on. It is not my burden to carry....I am also noticing that I just can't seem to watch shows or commercials or anything with small children in it. I am not even a Dad yet, and I am getting emotional over this stuff. This is very far from my character. It is almost as though I am becoming a woman.
Did I mention that I am getting fat....no seriously...tipped the scales at 222.5 yesterday. Fuck I need to get through the holidays below 230 and get my ass in gear. Thank god I will be getting some help with that from Santa.
I am gonna go now. Clearly this is not entertaining. I apologize. In the future I will try to be more entertaining. I may even become more entertaining tonight. Who knows.....
posted by Rally at
7:49 PM
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